Dissapointed, mad, and frustrated

I'm 38+ 2weeks pregnant I've been having regular contractions since I was 34 weeks but no dilation. Honestly I'm really frustrated that I haven't given birth yet when I see others who gave birth at 36 or 37 weeks to healthy babies.

I just want to hold my baby finally, and not be in pain. I'm constantly feeling jealous over everyone with their baby and I'm really disappointed that I'm not dilating.

I want a healthy baby and I know people are going to comment on here saying how I should wait to 40 weeks but that's not the point of this post. Just trying to vent my feelings here