My past SO
I just want somewhere to write about this. My first relationship I was in was an entirely online one, with a NY boy. I really thought I loved him, because I cared about how he felt. He has an illness called Sickle Cell Beta Thalassemia. It brings him constant terrible pain, and depression. The girl he actually loved killed herself, and I felt like the replacement..
I stayed with him for 11/2 years because I felt bad for him... not because I loved him. Therefor, I led him on. At the time though, I didn't realize I didn't love him... I was very confused emotionally, but could never talk about myself because his needs always needed to be first. 😢 He makes me feel like a terrible person, and he had said if I left him he would kill himself, I'm scared that will happen. Don't get me wrong, he was always sweet to me ... as long as I smiled and agreed dumbly with everything he said... I swear, it seemed like he had constant PMS lol.. mood swings galore.
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