Having trouble reaching orgasm

So I've never came. I've tried porn, I'm tried fingering, I've tried 2 different vibrators, hella lube, etc, and nothing worked. I recently got a bf and he wants to make me cum but I want to get myself off first. But anyway, last night we were doing it and I wasn't sure if I was close or if I had to pee, so I kept holding back. When you start to reach orgasm does it feel warm and/or like you have to pee? I know this seems like a stupid question but please no hate. Thanks!