My life has turned around and I am so happy!!

This is a post that will hopefully give some of you hope that things CAN get better!!

This past year has been very difficult for me. I went through some horrible post partum depression (which mostly transferred to anxiety), was diagnosed with a heart condition, and was emotionally abandoned by my husband.

I withdrew from everything. I stopped being a good mom (I was still decent, but I feel like I didn't do as much as I should've.), I stopped cleaning house, and just in general let things get out of control. There were times where I wouldn't shower for days at a time. I felt horrible about myself. There was always a feeling of impending doom and I couldn't grasp reality or find any stability. I felt like my life was falling apart and I had no idea why.

My husband comes from a family that is completely, 100% emotionally unattached and cold. He has never been able to bond with his parents or anyone really. He could not understand, and I did a horrible job of communicating to him, how I was feeling. He shut himself off to me and I felt neglected and blamed my depression on him, telling others I was being emotionally abused. My heart was so broken and thought my marriage was going to end. I couldn't see through my depression and couldn't see that I was a big part of the problem. I was wallering in my own misery and expecting him to be my knight in shining armour, when he had no idea I needed saving until I completely imploded on myself.

It was a turning point when I found out about my heart condition. It was a hard knock back to reality that I needed. I almost lost my life and the thought of not being able to raise my precious babies or grow old next to the love of my life was crippling.

I started eating healthier, drinking water, exercising, making it a point to find the positivity in EVERY SINGLE DAY!! I started kissing my husband again and opening my heart back up, and in return he opened back up to me. We started going back to church and are taking marital classes which have been tremendously helpful. I have jumped back into being the best mommy I can be and the rewards are endless.

I have always been such a happy, spirited person. Having PPD and struggling with my marriage were things I never thought would happen. I couldn't wrap my head around anything but my emotions and I almost lost my husband and my whole heart because of it.

I guess I'm writing this because I finally feel like I have made peace with my mistakes, my husband's mistakes, and I can finally move forward. Motherhood, marriage and life in general can be very trying, but if you stay positive and keep fighting everything will be okay!!

Everyone can, and most do, go through difficult times. Do not be ashamed to ask for help!

Think positive thoughts and give what you want to receive!! Love your children and your spouse like you won't have the chance tomorrow. ❤