Depressed

I think I really just need some.emptional support right now.. hubby tries his hardest but I think he truly doesn't understand. And to be honest I don't understand either. With my first pregnamcy (I have 5 year old twin boys) I loved EVERY second of it! I went from my normal 21 year old body to an adorable baby bump right away. I didn't have much morning sickness. My skin and hair glowed! I felt the boys super ewrly on since there was two and could also feel an immediate connection and bond with them... this time around... I'm mis3rable. I hate feeling like this but I can't help it. I'm either sad or anxious or irritated. (I do suffer from generalized anxiety and am on meds for it) I feel fat sweaty and greasy. I'm so disgusted with myself that I don't understand how you husband can even look at me. I feel like I'm failing in every aspect of life and since I can't feel the baby yet (even though I'm honestly huge even at 15 1/2 weeks since it's my second prwgmamcy and there were 2 the first time) i feel zero connection to it. I just feel like a terrible failure :-(