Is my fiancé an alcoholic?

Question

Disclaimer: I love the man, I do. He is a wonderful guy. During the week he does not drink. If he knows he has work in the morning he won't drink. He works hard, I know this and understand this. On the weekends, however, he gets *drunk*. Every single weekend. I find myself doing the same thing every weekend, going with him to wherever he gets drunk and waiting until 2-3 in the morning to finally (soberly) drive us both home. He says that because he only drinks on the weekends that it's not a problem. But every weekend? He also gets defensive and angry if I ask him to not drink for one night of a weekend. For example, we went to his buddies house last night where they drank all night and got pretty fucked up. So tonight, we were going to go see a movie, and he wanted to invite a friend over afterward. He said they would probably drink. I asked him if they could maybe hang out and not drink for just tonight and he got really upset with me. When I tell him that I don't like it he tells me that he doesn't care. Literally says "I don't care." Am I being crazy? Or am I engaged to an alcoholic?

Answer

Even if he isn't an alcoholic his priorities are mixed up. If the woman he "loves" asks him something or raises a concern and he can say "I don't care." Oh honey that's a big problem. 😅

Answer

It's a problem when someone is incapable of drinking without getting fucked up. So your husband can refrain from drinking on the weekdays but as soon as he has a drink on the weekends he has to drink until he's drunk. I would definitely consider that alcoholism or at least on the road to alcoholism.

Answer

I know from experience and my mother how alcoholics work because of my father. He's an alcoholic now from the way you've worded your story, and it will only get worse if there's stress or anything of the sort down the road. I mean he also has his priorities messed up majorly. I'm sorry but he seems like an ass and it will probably only get worse :/

Answer

He's an alcoholic. It's any drinking done on a regular basis. And u said every single weekend and he won't miss a weekend. He even gets furious when it's brought up. Sounds like an alcoholic to me and it does only get worse. My father is a recovering alcoholic.

Answer

I am a recovering alcoholic. I drank just like him. On weekends I would binge constantly. Then my alcoholism progressed into heavier street drugs...(thankfully I will have 2 years of sobreity soon!) Honestly, because he gets defensive and angry about you asking him not to, he does have a problem. It sounds like it's in the early stages though...

If you ever need to talk, I'm here!

Answer

It becomes a problem when the person cannot go without. And the anger and defensive attitude isn't a good sign either. Try to talk to him about it, if it doesn't work, see if someone can get him help somehow

Answer

I'm in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic / drug addict. And let me tell you, if he says he "doesn't care" or doesn't want to change whatsoever, you need to leave because things will get toxic. Things will get ugly and he will hurt you. That is the early stages of an alcoholic and things are to only get worse from there. We have been together for almost two years and he is almost a year and a half sober. He chose to better himself, and sobriety is a beautiful thing. I'm so proud of the fulsilling and successful man my man has become. But just know you can't change anyone. He will do things regardless of what anyone thinks or says. If he doesn't want to change, leave. I can't tell you what to do, but it's the best. I know what you're going through. So if you ever need anyone to talk to, I know your situation. Best of luck ma'am

Is my fiancé an alcoholic?

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