masturbating

am I the only girl that hates to masturbate? I think I over think it. I feel weird & bad like I'm not supposed to be doing it. I hate stimulating my own clit because it feels the best so I feel worst & I just don't like fingering myself. I've never made myself cum so idk what will make me cum. is it normal to feel like this? the last time I touched myself I was probably 14, I'm now 18