Basically I just need to vent, and since I don't have any friends. Ill just post here as it'll get lost but my feelings will be out. Aka you don't have to read. I'm not looking for sympathy, as I know others have it way worse than I do. Venting is healthy and I'm allowed to do it, wherever I please. Let me preface with I'm a military spouse, a low ranking one at that,  with that I mean we make shit money. I used to have a "hardly over minimum wadge job" with shit hours, so shit money. But we we living ok. I ended up quitting as I had a better job lined and and things fell through. So now we're living off one paycheck as I look for a new job (it's been a couple months but I can't seem to find anything) were poor. We have enough for out bills and some food (not as much as I would like) but that's it. Don't have money for anything unexpected. And I'm just tired of it. I can't even afford a haircut, or proper fitting bras, or professional looking clothes for an interview (my last job was though a friend and I didn't need an interview and then wore a uniform) anyway. We don't have much furniture as we've only been married for 6 months. And I would love to buy more, really getting out house put together. I hate out couch, it's the ugliest thing I've seen, but what we could afford and it's used. I'm depressed being home all day, as I said I don't have friends (never been one for them) and then my husband comes home and wants to play video games and yell into the mic with his friends and it makes me want to strangle him, yes I've talked to him about it, but I also feel guilty about him needing time with his friends, (we only have one tv so I can't just go somewhere else, plus our house is one floor and I can hear him anywhere I go.) I'm just down. I want change. But I can't seem to find it. We were supposed to go on a trip a couple weeks ago, completely paid for through our church. But something happened with the list and instead of doing people who signed up first, there was some rank involved. So we got booted off the list. I was really looking forward to it, thought it was the kick start I needed. But I didn't even get that. I feel like I get nothing in life (oh I'm such a spoiled brat I have a roof over my head)sure but I only have enough food to last a two weeks out of the month. I dont know. I'm just down, I'm stressed, and I'm worried about my future.