I'm in a gloomy cloud

So I'm 22 & I'm trying to join the army by the end of the year ! 💪🏾😎 but lately I've been in this dark cloud , my friend guy is away for a year he's in the military which I'm starting to get more & more emotional about . So ... I finally met my weight requirement which is awesome so now it's testing time. Which I want to hold off on for maybe 2 months & study study study . Well I work 8-10 hrs 5 days a week 3rd shift at a distribution center , I workout often , I get little sleep & im trying to fit studying in there. But in my mind I've already left for basic training lol , like I'm so over my job the people . I walk through the doors & its insistent depression like I hate it !!! I've been in a freak this job mood for like a month , like I just don't care anymore . It's not good , I just needed to express how I'm feeling about life right now . Like I know I'll pass my test , but I'm so ready to make it official . Help me get out of this cloud before I go crazy ! My mind has literally left my job my body just hasn't followed . * sorry I wrote this like I text *