Is there something wrong with me?

Question

I've had some bad things happen in my life.  This has caused me to not like being touched. I'm not very sexual at all. But i have my moments where i like physical stuff.  I've never had sex, and i feel it's won't because of the way i am.  My mom says it's one of the best parts of being in a relationship.  I feel like I'm not normal and i hate it.  So i guess what I'm asking is if I'll grow out of this?  Or will i always dread being with someone because I'm scared to be touched? (I'm not good with explaining and I'm sorry)

Answer

I understand what you're getting at and I know that it's scary..I only just recently lost my virginity I was terrified but I know that I love and trust him and he was very gentle and promised that if I didn't want to go any further he'd stop and asked a lot of the time..you don't have to feel pressured to do anything you don't want to do just wait till you know for sure who it is you want to be with and when it's all up to you when you decide ❤️

Answer

talk to a sex therapist about this. It's a special therapist who deals with people who have anxiety about sex due to trauma in their life. They are basically like psychologists but they focus more on anxiety about sex and relationships. I went to one because I have a nerve condition that makes sex excruciatingly painful, so I became anxious, afraid of sex and cried whenever someone touched me. Cried after everytime I did something sexual.  The therapist was very helpful to dealing with the anxiety and I've been able to feel like i can get intimate without the anxiety.

Answer

When I was 17, my brother committed suicide and I stayed with a best friend of mine. It was okay, then we started dating. He and I were together for almost a year when he became controlling, a cheater, a liar, abusive (because I wouldn't sleep with him), and manipulative. One day after almost 3 years together I decided I was tired of his lying, cheating, controlling, and physical abuse. I told him I was leaving at 11pm and I went to the er and found out my nose had been broken along with me having 2 cracked ribs and 38 bruises. He was charged with assault and battery. Four years later, I just celebrated my first wedding anniversary on July 25th with my junior high crush, the man I lost my virginty to at 19. We started dating a month after getting away from my ex. We're now trying for our 1st baby. Don't worry, you just have to find the right person who makes you want to be in a physical relationship.

Is there something wrong with me?

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