Okay so I am 21 weeks pregnant. My boyfriends mom which I just call her my mother-in-law is a new grandma. Her first grandchild was just born which is my boyfriends older brothers daughter, and a couple days after she was born I found out I was pregnant, so my boyfriends mom was super excited to not just have 1 grandchild but 2. Anyways, she has had 5 kids so she's very experienced you must say. Okay so this is the real issue I'm having here, the baby shower & other things. But we'll start with the baby shower. She's hosting it (which I never asked her to but she feels obligated because she's the grandma), but I've never understood the whole surprise thing, like I wanna know ALL about it, that's just how I am. So first off, MY family isn't around much, they live in Puerto Rico but they're coming to visit for the baby shower (my mom, grandparents, sisters). My boyfriends mom was sort of complaining about money issues because she has to pay for the baby shower, I've offered to help pay since it is my child but she refuses. And my family has offered to help but she refuses to get any help because she's the grandma (even though my mom is the grandma too). My mom offered to have the baby shower at the house that she owns in Florida, where we live. And I loved that idea because I was raised in that house & my mom is getting ready to sell it soon!! But his mom doesn't want to have it there (which is free) but she's always complaining about money. So she decided to have it some venue that cost over $200 for just 3-4 hours, and setting up & cleaning up is apart of those hours. So I feel like there's going to be no time & it's going to be rushed. And I haven't even seen this place yet. Now the other issue is COLORS!! I told her I want sports theme but the main colors to be navy blue, white & orange (I've always loved the color orange) and she hates the colors, she refuses to do those colors... And every time I try to put my opinion in there she says "this isn't your baby shower" this is my first child & I feel like I can't even be excited! Also, she wants to buy the crib & the crib set & everything. And I told her I will buy that stuff because I know she's struggling with money but she said no because that's her grandchild. But it's my first child. I wouldn't be complaining of she just wouldn't complain about helping. She's always complaining about helping & how stressful it is. She's always saying "I need a 2nd job". I told her my family can buy the crib & she said no they can buy the stroller or something & I thought that was very rude like my family doesn't matter. Idk could you guys just tell me how y'all feel about this??? I'm not trying to act ungrateful or selfish. I'm stressed out about this. I just needed to let that off my chest. But y'all let me know how y'all feel about it please.