struggling :(

i had an abortion Feb. 11 of this year so it's been over 6 months. i had the surgical method & everything went smoothly. the day of i had no emotion except crying right before she gave me the anesthesia. when i woke up i was relieved & ok. i was ok up until a couple months ago when it started hitting me that i had an abortion. it almost feels not real but when i think back to it now i get really really sad... more disappointed in myself i think because i'm young (even though i know i made the right choice) & the expierence is something i never wanna think about again. but i hear people talk about it & hear sides & the sides that are against it just make me feel like a piece of shit when i hear them. idk i'm just struggling & is hoping to get some feedback from people who have gone through the same