High anxiety about partying.. What's wrong with me? Such a loser...

Question

I'm 18 and a college student and a pre nursing major. I'm a total nerd.

Like I spent 5 hours of my Saturday writing my essay for a class and starting an essay early for another class. I also went to the gym in the morning with a friend and then again in the evening. Then I ordered pizza for my dorm room and had friends come over for a movie night.

I am loving my life right now.

But my school is huge on drinking. My college city is #1 has drunkest city in the nation. We are also #1 in the country (US) for alcohol related arrests.

I partied for the first 2 weekends. I blacked out the first two days and the other ones are hazy.  Nothing bad happened, but I found little enjoyment in it.

My friends don't drink. And that makes me feel better.

The peer pressure and fitting in drinking is driving me nuts.

I'll have tons of people ask me to go partying with them. And now I turn it all down.

I'm a huge nerd and I'd rather get straight A's to earn my way into nursing school.

Why do so many students my age feel the need to go out and brag about it?

There will be people posting about beer pong and drinking at parties on snapchat (not deleting them because they are friends). There are people shouting outside about where the parties are at.

What is wrong with me that I don't want to go out getting drunk?  I feel like I'm missing out, but I enjoy reading my anatomy books more...

I worked out for 3 hours yesterday instead of going out and it was amazing.

I'm just so lost... :(

Answer

It's perfectly fine and actually wonderful that you don't feel the need to go out and get wasted. Especially wanting to be a nurse (or anything in the medical field). If the cops bust a party and you're caught underage drinking or especially driving under the influence--you can kiss that career choice goodbye. It's not worth risking it just to fit in with other people. I'm a nurse myself, work in an ER, and we get lots of drunk people brought to us. Why anybody wants to do that to themselves is beyond me. Just keep being awesome and good luck in school!!

Answer

I'm 40 years old, I have a master's degree, and a successful career as a college instructor (16 years and counting) and department chair, and I'm applying for a dean position this year. Guess how much partying I did in college:  practically none. And guess who cares: no one. My point is, while in the situation, it seems so important to fit in and seem "normal", but if a successful future is what you are looking for, worry only about what you need for yourself and not impressing or fitting in with your peers.

Answer

I understand 100%. I'm not a drinker because alcoholism runs in my family and I've seen where 'harmless partying' can lead. Plus, I just don't jive well with the party metality. I love having control over my surroundings and going to college for the whole reason college exists..to further my education! You're not weird, you're smart!

Answer

Girl do your own thing! If drinking isn't for you than just do what you love! There is no fault in it and you'll be healthier in the long run for not drinking and partying all the time.

Answer

I'm 20 and I've always been the same way. I would rather stay home curled up with a book and a good cup of tea than go get wasted. I've never seen the point or the fun in it! It just sounds miserable and gross and parties are so not my scene. I've been to several, I gave them a good try, but I never liked them and I always ended up only staying for a little while. I was miserable! But if your friends don't drink and you don't want to do it, then don't! There's nothing wrong with that and honestly I don't think you'll ever regret your decision. Besides, you're still underage. It's not even legal yet! Enjoy your college experience YOUR way. Don't feel like you have to enjoy it the same way as the girls down the hall from you. It's your choice and to be honest , I think you're making the right one. You're going to go far! Don't lose sight of your dreams.

Answer

Screw em. While they're alcoholics in unhappy marriages (most likely outcome) you'll be successful and happy in healthy non alcoholic related relationship. Most likely.  Lol but honestly I have the most fun when I drink and remember everything and still have 70% motor function.  Most that happens to me is I spill my drink a lot and laugh a lot. I've never blacked out and only had a throw up hangover once. If I don't want to drink anymore I just stop. And you don't have to. Find people who are like you so you don't have to feel pressured if you don't like saying no. Best thing I learned in life is the best friends will support your decisions and respect them. Especially if they're helping you rather than harming!

Answer

There's nothing wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with being a nerd. There's nothing wrong with not enjoying drinking. There's nothing wrong with not partying in college. Your real friends will understand if you aren't interested in the party scene.

Answer

There's nothing wrong with you. You just like different things. It's good to have your priroties straight and it's good that you enjoy being studious.

I just thought: Well shit 😂what's wrong with me that I can't be like you. Granted I don't party all the time and I make good grades, but I'd rather be dancing with friends or with friends in general (or reading a book/writing for fun) than doing homework. It takes up so much of my free time. I hate hate HATE school this semester because my classes suck.

Answer

You're not missing out on ANYTHING. Getting drunk isn't fun (from my experiences). Keep focusing on school and your future. I think that's way more respectable and awesome 😍🤗😊☺️

High anxiety about partying.. What's wrong with me? Such a loser...

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