My husband and I conceived in July and were due to have a baby may 2nd. We were beyond excited. A couple weeks before my 10 week appointment I came across an article online about missed miscarriages. I never knew what they were. After I read the article all I could think was what if this happens to me. I always checked the toilet paper after I went potty in hopes of not seeing blood. But after reading the article I had a weird feeling this would happen to me. The next couple weeks leading up to my appt I had a deep gut feeling this would happen to me. I have no idea why. I just couldn't shake the feeling. At my 10 week appt my doc said she was going to try and hear the heartbeat but there was only a 50% chance at 10 weeks that she would. When she didn't find the heartbeat I told her I wanted an ultra sound. And she politely explained to me why it wasn't necessary. This happens all the time. I told her deep down I knew something wasn't right. She asked if I had any symptoms of miscarriage  and I told her no, just that I felt an emptiness and just didn't feel pregnant anymore even tho I had your typical morning sickness, sore breasts, exhaustion, and cravings. She was hesitant with the ultra sound but agreed to put my mind at ease. I was taken to the ultra sound area where a tech did my ultrasound. I could see my little baby on the screen and all the measurements she was taking of it. What a sigh of relief. There's my baby. After we were done she said well your baby is only measuring 9 weeks. I said well that explains why we couldn't  hear the heartbeat and let out a sigh of relief. She gave me a weird look and said "oh, there's no heartbeat, I thought you saw that". My world was shattered. How did I know?  Somehow I knew all along. I wish I was wrong. But I wasn't. I had a D&C on Tuesday. I'm struggling to move past this. I want my baby back. My husband and I had so many plans already made. All I do is cry. Nothing seems to help. I feel like I lost myself. What do I do now?  We want to try again but they told me the antibodies in my blood fought off the pregnancy. They aren't sure if it will happen again. Is it worth trying again? Or will i have to go through all this again. I dream about my baby. I can't escape my emotions. I feel so hopeless.