Feeling defeated...

This is only the 5th month of trying since we lost our baby back in March but every bfn hurts. It's like I keep being reminded that I'm a failure month after month. I actually thought that this month was the month. I just don't understand. I really want to be positive and keep saying that next month will be the month but it's hard. Especially when every time I look up someone at my job is getting pregnant or having a baby...