love triangles are a bitch

I know I sound like every. Stereotypical bitch out there right now but I really need a place to vent and hopefully receive some insight so here's the story- my boyfriend and I have been together coming up on eight months next week. We've endured his fathers death, my homelessness, both of us having stints in the mental hospital, and living together all in that time period. However about three months ago he and I split when I found out he'd cheated on me. He went to rehab blah blah blah came out a new person and things have been GREAT ever since then genuinely, but I've been having this gnawing feeling in the back of my head... I can't stop wishing I was spending all this time with my best guy friend. He and I briefly admitted our feelings for each other right before my boyfriend and I got back together and over the last three or so months theyve only been getting stronger despite how wonderful my salvaged relationship has been. I adore this boy. We vibe on a level that is both intimate and comfortable and he's like stepping into a cool shower in the afternoon when you're home alone. The problem is I live with my boyfriend and I'm very financially dependant on him at the moment trying to get back on my feet from losing everything. I feel like I owe it to my boyfriend I'm with now to stay in it for the long haul due to everything we've been through and because I love him. I just don't know if I'm in love with him anymore. I can't decide if i should stay and cut off contact with the best friend and hope I fall back in love with my man or if I should walk away and apologize for wasting his time with a new adventure in mind. I'm sorry for the long post I just have no one to talk to. I'd love your imput but please don't be rude.