Depression is a bitch.

2015 was the worst year of my life. I was unemployed for 11 months and had to get on public assistance, my boyfriend of almost two years verbally abused me, confessed to doing drugs, then left for another woman, and two of my best friendships turned toxic and ended. I wanted to die. Fast forward to now and here I am "thriving" on the outside....but still crying myself to sleep almost every night. It's like my heart didn't get the message that is safe to come out again and I don't know how to fix it. I'm sick of feeling unloved and numb. Does life ever truly get better?