I lost him ...💔

On December 11th 2016 ... at 4:00am ... my water broke .. I was only 15 weeks ... I went in to the hospital nd they did an ultrasound nd all I can see was his heart ... they did a cervix check nd my cervix was open .... I was told I'm gonna loose him ... I had an infection right where the baby was that caused my water to break ... they couldn't detect this infection at all ... every time he was a healthy baby boy .... I was in the hospital for 11 hours straight .... I haven't stopped crying ... I wake up now expecting to wake up from a horrible night mare .... I wake up expecting to feel him move .... I wake up with such a heart ache I can't bare ... I miss him so much ... he was my first baby ... my baby boy . My world .. my everything .... nd i feel like my world just got ripped out of my hands .... I know it's not my fault .... but I can't help but feel like it is ... baby Elias if you can hear nd see mommy please know I will always love you and miss you nd will never forget you ... you will always be mommys number one nd be my baby boy .... save a spot in heaven for me because I know one day we shall meet again ...