Am I??? (Long post)
Soo I'm honestly feeling real shitty tonight even though it shouldn't even really matter at this point.. but thinking back on my life I feel like I could have done things differently and more smart.
I'm 21 years old, have been with 13 guys that's including the one I'm with now. I'm settled down with him and having a baby. ❤️ very happy for myself!
Anyways, I just feel like maybe I was a slut.. for sleeping with that many guys? I had gone through a phase where I was just sleeping with guys but not wanting any sort of relationship with them. Those guys wanted a relationship with me but I didn't Pursue it and kind of blew them off. I'd actually say I was definitly a player. I also had gotten pregnant at the age of 14 from the guy who I lost my virginity to. My mom had forced me to have an abortion since I was so young and I actually had gotten pregnant couple more times after that and didn't keep the baby. (Please do not judge) I already feel as if im a horrible person, who's slutty and just not a good person.
My ex of 5-6 years who I haven't been with for about 1- 2 years now, also cheated on my more than once. After that I feel as if I lost respect for him and also myself, but he asked me out, I accepted his apology and after that I cheated on him. I'm thinking maybe it was to get him back(stupid I know) I was young. But anyways i never cheat on my partners, that's the only time I did.
Basically what I'm asking is, has all that made me a shitty person????
I feel as if it has, but I'm really not that person that played guys, got abortions, and cheats on partners,
Drinking everyday and almost having to go into rehab for it at a young age doesn't help. And losing my father at the age of 14 I feel had something to do with my actions as well.
What do you guys think about all this?
(Sorry this is so long)
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