just so fed up!!!!

I never thought I'd be married but a single mom! My husband is never home! He's not out cheating he's constantly bending over backwards for his fucking job! He just got home last night will be home for a week then gets to leave for another week! Then gets to come home before going to fucking Florida for a week ALLLLLLL while I'm fucking here! Raising our daughter and starting January 2 I'll be back at work! But when he is home he isn't spending shit of time with us! NOOOOO! He's working on his POS truck or our house or on his phone! So I get to raise our daughter alone, take care of our house, work, and just wait for him to want sex because that's the only time I get his attention. But that should be good enough right? I feel like a fucking whore because he only wants me to get some then immediately goes back to doing something he wants to do. I'm just done! He can cancel plans with us for his job but he can't ever call into work for us. He doesn't even know his daughter! He doesn't know her faviorte kind of music or how to keep her alseep. How many diapers she goes through a day or how often she eats. He has never heard her giggle. He doesn't know what size clothes she's in. She's only a month old so it's really scary to think about what it's going to be like for her 5, 16, 20 years in to the future. And on that note when she's little she's going to get to see him go to Florida, Arizona, Illinois all these other places and she going to be like 6 and want to go too and not understand why she can't and he will just get to leave and I'll have to be the one home who deals with her upset because she can't go because to her it will be a vacation. I'm just so fed up with my daughter and I being out on the back burner. We both deserve someone who will make time for us. He gets home after 9 last night after being gone for a week. I have dinner made and waiting for him we eat, I put my daughter to sleep and clean up the kitchen while he plays on his phone, screws around in his garage, and takes a shower. Then he wants sex and like always he gets it just to play on his phone right after then go to bed and I wake up with our daughter all night and he gets up for work this morning just to tell me that he'll be working on his truck tonight. I'm tired of being a single mother with married woman responsibilities. I'm tired of him getting to have the best of both worlds by getting to run all over and do what he wants but the ability to say he has a family and a steady income of sex while I'm the only one raising the family and just being used for that sex! I'm sorry this post is so long I'm just so pissed!