help me!

Ok so I'm 15 years old and last year I got my first proper kiss with this boy that I had liked for a long time, but afterwards it was super awkward and we didn't talk for a long time but later that year me and a few friends went to his house and he fingered me. Also in December last year he fingered me again after I told him how shit he made me feel after we didn't talk for so long but now it is even worse! I feel like he just uses me when we see eachother. I don't know how to talk to him, I've tried having casual conversations with him but he's not really a talker and I'm not either, what can I do? Also, I know I'm 15, but I always drunk call and message him and I feel like he hates it but doesn't tell me, how do I make things not awkward anymore and we can maybe have casual hookups again?