I've been wanting to meet my "dad" for awhile now. I've never met him bc according to my mom he was arrested before I was born for beating her. He payed child support and all that bs. But my mom never talked about it again and I won't ask bc it'll just upset her. Fast forward a few years the guy I was dating his mom I guess knew my dad. Saw him at the store and showed him a pic of me from homecoming and said his eyes "welded up with tears". She asked me if I would want to meet him and I said yes but it never happen. I can't remember why. We might have broken up before we could meet. Fast forward a few more years to my current bf. He was at a party and a good friend of his asked him about me and that he knows my "dad" and works for him at a construction company in my area. My bf only knows his first name and I could easily find him though the internet but the problem I have is if I should. A part of me wants to bc I have so many questions and a whole other family I've never met. But the other part of me wants to say "fuck him" bc he left. He never bothered to find me after I turned 18 or get custody etc. Idk what to do bc that one part of me wants to believe that maybe he didn't beat my mom like she said (I know that sounds messed up, but I know how my mom can be) and wants to see me. I was just wondering if anyone here has any advice or has been in my situation. Anything positive would be greatly appreciated
EDIT: I just wanted to say thank you to those who commented. You guys made some really good points and really helped me out.