I am giving up

I am the girl who was anon the other day talking about how someone used a picture I took to spread love and someone I trusted took that picture and spread it on Twitter. My friends left me. My family was hurt by these people being so rude. I am still in therapy, searching for someone to support me. They all say I am sane and I am not a bad person, that this will pass, I will still live my version of the American dream and all that. But I still feel insane, like I might be a bad person. I just... don't know how to feel and niw, I can sayI am giving up on it all. I know no one will care, no one will read this, but this is my final attempt to bring peace. Please do not use violence to achieve any goal. Hate only beings more hate. I used to think I was a good person. I didn't follow Islam perfectly— I had a boyfriend, I lied when I was younger, but I always thought I was an alright person. Maybe had a few thousand years in hell before being granted Paradise because I was a nice human (Islamic teaching). But now I feel so dirty like the only way I can do any good is to end it all. Good bye.