My mom left my twin sister and I when we were just about to turn three. She cheated on my dad multiple times, and even admitted to having three abortions (my dad's). There have been a few seasons in my life when I have been very angry, but for the most part, I've accepted it. Mainly due to my amazing dad!  He was both mom and dad to us, and he never shut the door on her. She just decided to not walk through it too often (very rarely). I was very angry with her as a pre-teen, and then again in my early twenties. Now I am feeling it again! Soon to be 36 and TTC for almost 2 years. I so long to be a mom! How can she have carried her twin daughters in her stomach, feel us move, see us grow for our first couple of years... and then just...... leave!? I just can't understand. I don't hold a grudge ..... but that angry feeling is creeping in again as I once again face another month of "trying" and being let down...... how can any parent just leave.... let alone a mom!?