Mom Problems!!! help

My mother has always been really bossy and negative. I love her because she is my mother but she is negative all the time. Always telling me how to parent my son how to treat my husband, and always complaining that I'm doing things wrong and I don't come home more often. I know that she is probably just trying to help but whenever I confront her about it she makes it a big deal and says that we should just forget about her and that we don't care about her. We live three hours away and have to come visit her every month or she will get pissed. It's really hard to travel with a one year old. I feel like I can't do anything right. Part of me just wants to distance myself away from her since she causes me and my husband so much stress. I have confronted her and she just gets mad. What else would you ladies do?