chemical?

 But here today I go for my first morning pee and find two spots of blood on my panties. I finish, wipe and yes bright red blood. I'm crushed.. but sort of numb... I get in the shower and just start sobbing. The red turned to brown blood.. now it's back to bright red. Only when I wipe. It doesn't come out on the panty liner. There is no cramping no pain. No clots just red. 

So it's now 5 o'clock I have just rested took 2 naps because I'm just exhausted. I just dont feel I can handle this again. But would this be a chemical? I'd probably only be like 4 weeks if that.. and this is just AF? Maybe that I can handle better. I plan to call my dr in the am. Whom I haven't even established care with so not sure what they will even say. I feel so lost and alone. Of course I haven't even told anyone but my husband about the positive test so no one will even understand.

I just want a baby. That's it.