ok so i think i have the smallest flattest butt, i could stand against a wall and my butt isn't big enough to put space in between me and the wall, i always say "my butt is so flat it's like my back goes straight into my knees" and my boyfriend is always like "it's nowhere near that small, you have a butt, is it the biggest butt in the world? no, but you got a little booty" or he'll jiggle it or trace the (very) slight curve of it and be like "see if your butt was as flat as you say it is i couldn't do that" anyway, i walked past him and he went to smack my butt, but he missed and smacked my back and i screamed "ow! that was my back" and he replied "oh sorry, i couldn't tell" i was like "ok… ok you got me"