How does it feel to cheat on your SO?

How does it feel? I honestly want to know. When you ask to marry a person and then turn a around and cheat. Why? What's the purpose? Does it make you feel good? Am I not enough? Why even get married if being monogamous is so difficult for you? How many times am I supposed to forgive you? How many times am I supposed to be a bigger person and fight for my marriage? Do you still expect me to sleep next to you at night? Fuck you? Why do you expect for me to forgive you when I can mentally picture you saying the thing you say, doing the things you do, and being who your supposed to be with me to someone else? How? Just explain to me why? You can't say you care about my feeling when your dick is in someone else's pussy. You just cannot. Do you want an open relationship? Why didn't you tell me? Why did you even choose someone that can't even help you? Did it feel good at least? Was it worth it? How am I supposed to feel? What am I supposed to do?