Animal help please.

I got this cat from the pound back in October after we put one of ours down because she was too sick to be saved. It was the hardest thing I have done in a really long time. The vet told me when he examined my other cat that she was in depression over the loss of our other cat and that it could kill her because she wasn't eating, so we got her a new friend. I loved this cat at first, super sweet, friendly, cuddly. Her and my other cat get along really well now. But the cat has changed. I had to show her my dominance at first because she was doing what cats do when the try to show dominance, peeing, pooping and leaving it uncovered and she was aggressive toward me. So I talked to my vet and did everything he told me to and she stopped. But now she is OBSESSED with my husband. Follows him everywhere, is always on him, meowing at him. My vet says that the way she claims him is like her trying to be alpha female with the alpha male, so now we are working on that, plus my husband can't stand it anymore because she is so clingy and crap with him. And now another big issue that the vet doesn't really know how to help anymore is her getting on our counters and tables and pushing everything off of them. She is teaching my other cat to do it as well. She also claws everything. Destroying my couches and stuff. She is still aggressive with me, but also acts terrified of me when I get upset with her. I have never been abusive towards her besides what my vet has said. Spray bottles, tape and cat sticky paper, lavender, scratching posts, cat nip. Literally just about everything. Nothing is working. I can't stand her anymore! I want to take her back to the pound, but my husband loves her so I don't want to do that to him. So please help me find a way to get her to stop! Because if I can't idk what else to do besides take her back.