14 weeks and lost my baby

I found out the day I was 14 weeks that I had a blood clot that had grown so big it bursted my placenta open, and starved my baby of oxygen, and nutrients. I'm having a hard time grasping this, and not strangling my doctors as I feel if they would've given me an ultrasound earlier as I was having MANY complications, they would've caught this, and I would still be carrying a healthy breathing child.