lost without answers
Yesterday morning I took my usual prenatal vitiman, by 10:30a I'm in the ER. They're running their standard tests. The US tech comes in and wheels me back to US. A little taken back because it wasn't Keri (the tech that I saw so many times before my last MC in April). This lady was a little stern and very blah. She tells me "climb on the table, scoot your butt to the edge, & put your legs in the strups. I'll give you a few mins to do so. I'll be back!" Doing as told, but feeling very unsure about everything as I lay there waiting for her to come in. She comes back in and instructs me put my hands under the sheet and grab the wand. At this point I'm even more confused. She then tells me that I'm going to insert the wand. After inserting the wand she begins her procedure. She's very quiet, so I ask "can you see a heartbeat?" She shoots me a glare and says "we're not allowed to diagnose!!!" Fast forward, now I'm back in my room and sever people come back and forth to talk. Finally my PC-A comes in and says to me "it looks like there is no fetal pole and your levels are 1300 which would only make you 3/4 weeks along. Are you sure your were pregnant?!" I explained that I miscarried last month at 2months and she said "well this is an incomplete miscarriage with tissue left over from last time." I told her that I had a D&C and she then said "well we don't know". I showed her my US pic and told her that I saw the heartbeat last week, Wednesday made me 7wks along and my due date was set for 1/10/18 and now you're telling me that there is nothing there. She leaves the room and the RN walks in with my discharge papers my diagnoses |INCOMPLETE MISCARRIAGE| I sat and cried. My RN left the room, bus before leaving she instructed that I get dressed and left my work excuse on the trash can. My partner informed me that he'd be home around 9 because was going to go to the hospital to see his niece who was just born, all I could do was cry. How could he be out celebrating his niece and we just lost our second child this year?! Needless to say we had a terrible storm and he didn't come home until this morning. I just don't understand, taking a prenatal vitiman when I wake up, now I'm going to sleep taking a birth control pill. Celebrating the life of others and leaving me to sit and cry alone. Unsympathetic hospital workers, employers, and family members. I'm just lost, I feel like a shell.
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