I need some help ladies, (TMI details included)

I've never had an orgasm. during my last relationship I faked it all (it was abusive and if I didn't orgasm life became an even worse hell), I left and I've been single since, I'm worried to start a new relationship but I'm terrified of getting into bed with a new man because I can't come, what if he refuses to date me because of lack of orgasms. I like to masturbate and it feels nice when I have sex but I can never get to the end, I've googled everything and tried all the tricks and tips but still gotten nowhere!

Is anyone else like this? How do you cope and how does your man feel about it?

(Also I had a slight accident when I was 10yo, I fell and skidded my vag against tarmac, I don't get loads of sensation from my clit when it's touched, I have to really rub hard to make it feel good, and I don't really get much outta oral)

What can I do? I'm desperate girls, I see everyone on here commenting on how much they orgasm and how good it feels and I feel nothing.

Edit, I'm 24, I'm on antidepressants and have been for over 10 years, I changed the type 18 months ago and my libido increased a bit.

My ex took my anal virginity by force 5 years ago and I have panic attacks if anything goes near my ass, It hurt too much and I hated it.