so has depression and it's all just a little too much 😫
So my boyfriend who I have lived with for a year and a half has been diagnosed with depression...Â
It all first started before Xmas and I spent a lot of time thinking it must be me that's caused it as he was fine before he met me and he didn't see his friends that he used too...
After finally been able to accept I probably will never know the cause I tried to help him the best I could, suggested he goes to the gym with his brother.... but that only lasted around 6 weeks, managed to get him to the docs and get tablets however he stopped taking them twiceÂ
And it having to take arguments and upset to get him to see he needs help and the tablets are a good start as he will not talk to anyone about what's going on...
To now where he's finally back on tablets and now told his mum and other family members, but iv learnt today he's really opened up to them and I can't help but feel really upset about it, like he doesn't want to open up to me 😫
Iv worked my arse off today, it's his birthday Monday and he says I never really make an effort with his family so I arranged for a suprise BBQ party with all his family and friend and even got a bouncy castle for all the kids, it's come time to get into bed together and he gets in bed and just goes to sleepÂ
No hug no kiss no thank you nothing and I know this illness wipes you out and makes you feel ridiculously tired I suffered with it for 3 years myself but I am so upset.
I put so much effort into today and I just feel like he doesn't care, I just want him to love me again. He's gotten really distant the past few weeks and I really just don't know what to do anymore 😓
I accept a LOT of behaviours because of his depression that I wouldn't accept if he was well, but I sometimes question it all, is it really the depression preventing him from showing me love or is it him just not loving me as much anymore? 😢Â
I don't expect any response from this I just feel loads better for having somewhere to offload otherwise I'd probably still be sat here crying lol...Â
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