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Question

Six months ago, my husband and I welcomed twins. I stayed home for four months and am home now for the summer as I'm a teacher. My husband works in NYC and so he's gone from 6am to 6/7pm. While he does a LOT for us when he's home, I can't help but feel like I do everything! I run all of the errands, I bathe them, I'm always the one home with them when all hell breaks loose, and it makes me resent him sometimes since he gets alone time. Even when I was working, I was the one bringing them back and forth to my family's houses for daycare.

I love him, he's an amazing dad, but damnit this mommy needs a break! Even when he's home, he acts helpless sometimes (though I don't think he's acting, I'm sure he's just not as experienced with everything as I am). Take tonight for example. The crib mattress was bare since I washed the sheet and didn't put a new one on yet. Instead of getting one (he could have asked where they were if he forgot), he brought it to my attention so I could do it. Are all men like this? Are we women that amazing that they can't live without us?  😂😂

Thanks for letting me vent. That man just gets on my nerves sometimes!

Picture for a cute effect.

Answer

Sometimes you have to bring it to their attention all the things you do when they aren't there. And let them know what they could do to help you when they're home. Men are naturally oblivious, so don't wait for the lightbulb to magically turn on- be direct, yet kind.

Answer

My husband works from noon to 9pm. I get our older daughter up in the morning and ready for school, breakfast, etc before leaving for work. All he does is make sure her school uniform is on and send her out the door (usually late). He does do dishes and laundry (I hardly ever touch laundry) so I try not to complain too much, but to be honest I'm terrified of how it will be when the twins get here...

Answer

I could have written this post myself. I am a SAHM and love it BUT it does sometimes make you resent your spouse. My DH leaves at 3am and gets home around 6pm. He's exhausted and works 12-13 hrs a day. Does that make me resent him any less at times? No. I am so thankful for everything he does and I make sure to tell him often but I'm the same breath I'm like "come on dude just help me!!!" I can say you'll have times where you want to scream at your SO but then it gets better. It really does I promise. My boys are 6 months old and for the last 5 I've done it basically on my own. I order groceries online and jus rhavento drive to the store, park, and they bring them out. I also make sure to have my boys nap at the same time as much as possible. Those 30 minutes alone mean the world to me. And my house is messy. It is what it is and I've given up. Acceptance is key lol

Answer

I imagine my husband 1st time daddy to be will be the exact same way! Fingers crossed but I'm not going to set high expectations lol

Answer

Oh Hunnie my husband is the same way. I have an 18mo old and I'm expecting twins and he still expects me to do it all. They think we're super woman (which we are) but a break is very necessary for sanity at times.

Answer

Most are! My hubby is the same way. He works 6am-6pm as well and I've gotten to stay home this pregnancy. I love it and enjoy spending time with my two kids especially right now that my oldest is on summer vacation but I know once my twin girls arrive most of it is going to be on me. My husband is awesome and supportive but he's the type that I have to ask him to do things around the house or whatever. If I don't it doesn't get done. It's hard because I'm the type that hates to ask for help. But we are both trying! I'd say just be patient and if you have to, ask him to help u more around the house 😊

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