Gestational Diabetes Rant

So I was diagnosed with GD at around 28 weeks.  I've miscarried twice before this pregnancy, so honestly the diagnosis didn't bother me too much- I was just happy to have made it so far finally.  Now at 34 Weeks I'm losing it.  Because of the miscarriages, I have been super healthy this whole pregnancy, and have not cheated with the diabetes diet AT ALL. Now my fasting numbers are going up, and I stay so confused about one hour or two hour checks after eating.  I've gained maybe 15 pounds total this whole pregnancy, and exercise 4-5 times a week. All I want is an ice cream sundae, but I'm trying so hard to avoid medicine, so I don't cheat...  I seriously thought diet and exercise could completely control my numbers and it's starting to look like it won't, and I'll have to go on medicine or insulin one.  Sorry... just needed to complain for a minute.  Sometimes I feel like I'm not allowed to complain or be upset while pregnant, because I have wanted a baby so long and had to go through miscarriages to get one... I feel like I'm not allowed to be mad.  Anyone else?