Drama with my in-law

My brother-in-law always criticizes my kids. He makes snarky comments about how much attitude my daughter has, and how he doesn't know how we handle my son because he is so annoying. He has said things like this within earshot of my kids. He also acts like his daughter is the most perfect child who couldn't possibly do any wrong when she instigates just as much mischief as our kids do when they're together. Just to clarify, they're all just typical kids. They are amazing and yet occasionally annoying as heck... they are kids!

I've talked with him before about how it bothers me, and how now that my son is eight he's taking those comments about his behavior to heart. Outside of these comments our families get along really well, and our kids love to play together, and I do generally like my brother-in-law.

This weekend we were all camping together and my son started to throw a fit about something insignificant, and my brother-in-law, while he was standing right behind him, says, "oh my God!" And rolls his eyes. I snapped and said, "hey! Please don't say stuff like that when he can hear you!" My brother-in-law then immediately said, "then let's just fucking go. We'll get our shit and leave." He packed up him and his family and left without another word to me or my husband. We were supposed to take his daughter for the week to give my sister-in-law a break so she'd only have their two young sons while he was out of town, and my son was the only one who knew that was the plan (it was supposed to be a surprise, but he overheard us) but all of the kids had been promised that she could do a sleepover in our camper that night. Obviously none of that happened and my son was in tears the whole time his uncle was packing because he thought it was his fault that his uncle was leaving and that we wouldn't get the week with his cousin. My brother-in-law did stop and talk to my son before he left and let him know it wasn't his fault. The rest of the family said I didn't do anything wrong and my brother-in-law was just throwing an adult temper tantrum.

I'm really sad about this situation because I really do enjoy my husband's family and I don't want to be the reason he and his brother aren't talking. He won't talk to me and I don't know how to resolve the conflict. But I will not apologize for protecting my son.