dear father

where are you... I miss you. I know I shouldn't but I do... you verbally abused us and idk why. I was only 5 when the divorce happen. I was confused. And you forced me to take medicine I didn't need... yet I still loved you. you yelled at me to eat stuff you knew I hated. yet I still loved you. you made my brother cry everyday because he wasn't perfect to you... yet I loved you and forgave you. I realize now that you were a horrible dad and you lied to us. you made my mo. scared to come home. you made my brother scared to speak and scared to do anything. you were an ass. yet... I miss you and I want to talk to you. I am 16 and my mom won't let me... I understand... I just want answers... you hurt everyone else except me... And now it's the opposite.. my step dad verbally abused me the most cuz I don't put up with his shit... now I know what my family went through with you....and I feel bad that I miss you and want to talk to you...