I want to talk to some women on here living with this. I'm about to pour out my heart here so please be kind and gentle with me.

I was diagnosed with this a few years ago but have been in denial of it and refusing to really acknowledge it, because my brother had Ulcerative Colitis and it's in the general family (though much worse than) IBS, and it put him in the hospital, where he was ultimately killed by medical negligence.

I've never really come to the point of making diet changes (other than no longer eating green leaf lettuce and cauliflower casserole because those mess with me SO bad) because it means accepting that I have this and that's so hard for me to do. I also keep it a secret from my family (except my husband) because it would just be too painful for them given what my brother went through.

It scares me because it technically puts me into greater risk of developing UC or Chrone's?

Apparently depression is also more likely when you have IBS, and that does hit me time to time.

I'm finally at a point where I'm ready to stop just dealing with the symptoms and start tracking foods, figuring out my triggers, cutting back on things, etc. It means I'll have to cut back on or cut out entirely some things I love dearly, like my morning coffee, which sends me running to the bathroom within half and hour to an hour's time. Possibly soda (I drink diet)? Possibly fried foods? And I love all those things and my husband and I love sharing a good fried food meal 😂

I'm kind of going to be going at it alone unless I start meeting with a doctor on my college campus, and I could really use some tips and support with keeping a food diary, how to ease out of consuming trigger foods and replacing them with things I will grow to love just as much instead, etc. I just really need some community support in general. I HATE accepting this but I can't keep up the lifestyle I live anymore. I want to start walking to campus when the Fall semester starts, and I don't think I'll be able to at this rate because of the sudden urgent need to go. I just want to be healthier in general and take care of myself more, and letting what I consume tear up my insides and just ignoring it simply isn't working for me anymore.

Anyone who deals with this condition, would you mind helping me take this leap of faith?