Take a year off or go back to work

Carmen • 👼🏻👼🏻👼🏻💙💙👼🏻👼🏻👼🏻💙🤰🏻

Okay ladies, I'm having a "great debate" with myself.

My SO and I, decided I wouldn't work for the first year after our boys were born; however, I'm starting to feel guilty about him being our sole provider. At the beginning of the year, I walked away from a well paying job; because, I didn't want to risk my pregnancy working 12-17 hours a day and always being stressed out. I've had a steady small income over the past few months which is going to be coming to an end soon, so I won't be able to contribute at all and my SO will be taking over my financial responsibilities and carrying all of the household expenses. His income would be sufficient, but we won't be able to live the lifestyle we're used to nor work on any of our house projects. Here's my issue, I've recently seen several job postings that have a lot of potential and would be a good long term career move; however, if I go back to work once my boys are 8 weeks I feel like I'm going to miss out on watching them grow and be babies.

So I'm just wondering what other people would do in my situation?

Just an FYI, I've been a workaholic in the past. I would have days were I would leave once my SO would get home in the morning and get home after he's already left for work at night, and I just don't want to get back into that habit with newborns at home.