I really just need some place to vent.

About 2 days ago I cheated on my fiancé. I told him and he understandably was furious. But he let me come down to see him and explain myself. We are in a long distance relationship so that makes things even harder. Over the past 2 days we have spent talking and figuring things out. He told me that he forgives me and the guy and that he will still try and work things out. I kept crying all weekend because I felt so awful. He had open arms for me to cuddle with him and I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I don't deserve the love he has shown me. I don't deserve the hugs and the snuggles that he still gave me. It was so hard to have little intimate moments with him after what I did because I felt like complete shit that he would still want to be with me after I betrayed his trust. The worst part about this whole situation is that the man I cheated with I told my fiancé that he didn't have to worry about anything with him. But my stupid ads went over to talk to him cause he was genuinely one of my friends. And I'm not really sure when it switched from talking to him making a move. The whole time I felt paralyzed and like I had a frog in my throat and I just laid there and let it happen. I have no good explanation or excuses to try and justify what happened.