I may be selfish....

I just want my rainbow baby! I misscaried February 28 of this year, and me and my boyfriend have decided to try again. I know it hasn't been long enough to be feeling down on myself but I am:/ I just want my rainbow baby! and my 2 year old son is not make it any better! he has just randomly started coming up to me and lifting my shirt and pokeing my belly going baby and then kissing it. no one has ever showed him this and he has never seen anyone do it. im hopeing its a sign, but I'm also reuinf not to get my hopes up o much! I've been having some early symptoms but every time i test I get a BFN and its starting to get to me! how does every one deal with get a BFN? like I said I'm starting to get down on myself every time I test:/