Married but dreaming about my ex
I have been married to my husband for 4 years. We are in our mid thirties. We have a beautiful house, enough money, an adorable toddler and a baby on the way. The honeymoon is over, for sure, but we are happy and doing well together.
But .... I keep having these dreams about my ex boyfriend from like 8 years ago.
That relationship was rocky. It lasted for 3 years. He was totally devoted, but I was half in/half out. I found him a bit feminine. He was a little bit dorky, a little hesitant about things, a people pleaser. I guess you could say beta-male. I just wasn't very impressed with him as a man. I felt like I was more than he could handle.
But he was also my BEST friend. We got along almost telepathically. We basically shared a brain. I loved him without even realizing it, it was so natural. We came from the exact same cultural background. He was like my twin.
But I was immature for my age, and I couldn't see past my expectation that he should be a "strong man". We broke up twice before it stuck.
When I met my husband, it was a "yes, definitely" for both of us. He was sweet and goofy and had me laughing all the time- without being at all effeminate. He had an easy manliness about him - he didn't have to try too hard. He was naturally respected by everyone.
He comes from Europe, so he has a different cultural background and feels a bit less like my twin. But I never for a moment felt like he was too weak for me.
My husband loves me fiercely. As much or more than my ex boyfriend ever did. He is committed. He is in it for life.
But I keep having these dreams about reconciling with my ex. (Who, by the way, also got married and now has a daughter. They live in another state, and while we are on good terms, there is zero communication between us and no chance of us ever reconciling in real life).
In the dreams, my husband doesn't exist.
And it's just me and my ex, trying to get back together.
The dreams come more often whenever I am feeling a little irritated with or distant from my husband.
This has been going on for like 2 years.
It is driving me crazy!!!!!
I unfollowed my ex and everyone associated with him on FB, thinking that would help. But still .... the dreams come. It's torturing me.
What does this mean????? Did I make a terrible mistake ??? Am I doomed to dream about this for the rest of my life ??? Am I secretly in love with my ex, after all this time?
Is this normal !!!?
Does this happen to anyone else??
What can I do??