Please don't hate me!

Last year I had a miscarriage and I had been trying to get pregnant for a whole year! & it finally happened! When I first found out I was pregnant I was over the moon! Now I don't know how I feel 😔 I feel so bad for feeling this way💔 what is wrong with me!? I didn't care whether my baby was a boy or a girl I just want a heathy baby❤️ well we had a gender reveal this weekend and I was not one bit excited or nervous? I guess it was just because I didn't care what it was? It's a boy and I don't know how to feel 😔 H E L P M E !