This is very long and I didn't know how to title it. I've been getting very depressed to the point it's effecting my marriage negatively. My whole life my parents have never been social people, my dad has always been kind of a geek obsessed with fantasy, sci fi and is extremely socially awkward. My mom is poorly educated, kind of a country bumpkin and smokes like a freight train. Growing up was extremely hard bc out of my friends I had the "odd ball" parents. There were no sports, no cards, no family time, both parents worked a lot. We lived in a rough part of town. All my friends lived in upper middle class neighborhoods, their parents were social, they hosted get togethers, very involved with the kids. I was extremely ashamed (I know..sounds terrible) of my families situation. I always smelled like smoke. I literally wore the same outfits from week to week, no variety like my friends. The only way my dad knew to bond was to talk to us about Star Wars, Star Trek or some really trippy fantasy book. My mom (not her fault) didn't know how to have an educated conversation about world events, etc. it's like i was lost and some days I feel like I still am. My parents are beautiful, kind people but definitely not my definition of the norm. There was no abuse, my parents are happily married... and as a kid I didn't think a whole lot of it until I was old enough to start really figuring things out. My parents have always neglected their health. Currently my dad is facing a foot amputation after years of not using his insulin, eating nothing but little Debbie cakes and a persistent ulcer on foot that has required hospital stays, early retirement, disability. A chronic liver disease (un related to alcohol... he has never tasted alcohol in his life) that causes ammonia to build in his brain causing fatigue, mental fog and confusion. My mom has emphysema, copd and still smokes 2 packs a day in the house. She has an absorption issue in her gut related to a surgery complication years ago that left her with a temporary feeding tube, the list goes on. For years whenever I talk to them it's always negative. As in about their health. And there's nothing else I can relate with. I don't know how to talk to either of them. I moved out of state to get away from the toxic environment and this strange relationship. I met my husband 3 years ago. We have a baby girl now. I try to be happy and positive and i get mad 😡. Because his parents are older than mine and in great health, active, social, fun and well rounded. I find myself asking why can't mine be like this? I get mad and resentful towards my parents. I don't like to talk to them much and I keep the convos short bc they quickly start talking about their health and I'm tired of hearing about it. I'm tired of letting their views on life, crappy health and neglectful ways affect my mental state. I wondered if anyone out there has gone through this and how you coped. I am really depressed today over it bc I found out my dads foot ulcer has worsened and bone is now involved. I'm feeling anger, sadness, confusion. I don't even know what else to say.