My worst fear...

My worst fear is that I'll never bring home a healthy baby. I had a stillbirth at 23 and since then not even so much as a pregnancy scare. Now, at 31, My husband (34) has had a semen analysis and everything is okay with him; me however not so much. I have a bicornuate uterus, mild endometriosis, and unexplained fertility. This last cycle I was put on 50mg Clomid, and to my surprise I saw 2 lines last Sunday and confirmed with 2 more on Monday. The lines were light, but a call to my Drs told me not to worry about how dark they were, just that they were there. On Thursday, mild cramping turned more intense and a visit to the ER revealed fluid around one ovary, a hemmoragic corpus leutum cyst on the other, no gestational sac, and a bhcg of only 10. The doctors said all that could be done was to wait and see, it was still very early and could be okay, or I could be on the verge of misscarrying. This morning cramping intensified and I began passing blood every time I went to the bathroom. As I write this post, I am misscarrying. I feel as though I will never carry a baby to term & bring one home healthy. It feels like I am doomed to endure loss after loss until I give up. And yet, all I can think about is when I can start another round of clomid and maybe get another bfp.