I really want pregnancy and labor-no longer afraid

Is it weird that I always thought I'd only adopt kids because I was afraid of labor.... and now with this medicine that made me unable to have kids (temporarily while taking it), I'm looking forward to biological kids and labor? That I crave it?

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I still plan on adopting at some point too, but I never had the great want for pregnancy and labor until it wasn't an option for me anymore... like I appreciate it more now that I thought I couldn't do it period.

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Like once I met my husband I decided I wanted biological kids too, but the idea of pregnancy and birth terrifies me to my core. And now, that pain seems worth it, a labor of love and being able to have something I thought I could possibly never have. I can't have kids on chemo, but I seriously want to try for babies as soon as I'm weaned off of it and fulfilled my detox period when I'm safe for pregnancy (that'll still take a whole year until that happens, best scenario)

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I feel like I have a nesting instinct right now even before pregnancy now that it's a possibility. I want to throw out excess stuff and make room for a baby that won't come for at least another 2ish years. But I have this craving and wanting to fix up our house, to perfect our communication so we can teach our child what a good relationship is (which we both never got with abusive/always fighting parents). I want to make a home for a baby to give them everything they need/deserve. While I've always been really weirded out by breastfeeding (as in the idea of me doing it, I have really sensitive nipples), but now I WANT that. I want to have that relationship with my future baby.

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Does this make any sense? I had baby fever before, but now I feel it's developed into an even deeper, more nurturing need that's way different than what I've felt in the past.