Feeling very disconnected from this pregnancy.

I feel very disconnected from this pregnancy my body is fighting me every step of the way. Between terrible cramps week 5 and 6 than morning sickness from week 6-8 and week 8 ended me up in the hospital receiving 4 litres of fluid because I couldn’t stop throwing up I cried to the doctor about how I just cant do it this time. I’m dizzy, sleepy constantly, nauseated all day all night, water makes me sick, food makes me sick, nothing is appetizing and I have tried everything to try to cope with how sick I have got, but after spending a full day in the hospital on iv getting medicine to stop throwing up and than struggling through that, than getting 4 litres of fluid because I was severely dehydrated from throwing up, unable to eat or drink much the following day because of nausea. And having no medicine work for me I’m at a loss I have cried and cried to my fiance that I can’t do this I do not enjoy being pregnant again and I don’t feel connected because of how sick I am. With a 1 year old drained me and this pregnancy making me beyond sick. I cant function. I’m at a loss I have become so depressed. So upset and nothing is helping. A doctor told me yesterday your refusing medicine that has little risk to baby and I said I tried 4 medicines to stop throwing up I’m not putting baby at risk he said well whatever there isn’t anything I can do your on your own. I balled my eyes out when he left and he came back in 2 hours later and apologized. I’m 19 and I feel very alone with this whole thing this pregnancy was not planned and I just got back to normal from my first I felt like I finally was getting my self back and now being sick all the time is unbearable someone help me I need advice