Seeking the 10% I don't get from fiancé 🙁

I would have been with my fiancé for 7 years in November and are due to get married in August! We met at 19 and I was his first. I had already had a previous serious relationship and other sexual partners. This may sound crazy with what I am about to say , but I do truly love my fiancé.

The problem is sex. For over 2 years now, there has been a lack of it and it's been so boring when we have it. I used this app to track our sex life just to prove it and we have sex less than once a month. I have spoken numerous times about it with him, begged him, cried with him, tried new things - I have exhausted all options to make it work and nothing has changed. I even told him that I'm close to cheating because I'm feeling deeply neglected and unwanted. I said I want to leave. He cried, he begged and we moved on!

My fiancé is 90% perfect but I had a 'one night stand' with this random guy 2 days ago. I got the 10% and I don't feel guilty. I did everything BUT HAVE SEX with this guy and I don't feel guilty. Mother Nature called and stopped us from having sex but I would go further. I am quite willing to live a secret separate life but that's the bitch in me. My wedding is in 7 months - what the fuck am I doing?

I have seen a lot of posts on here about cheating and people are trolls 😂

I just wanted to put this out there for people to get a different perspective on why people may cheat/get cheated on. People may agree and disagree.

The lack of guilt stems from the fact that I THINK he cheated in the past although he always denies. Also stems from the fact that I'm a human with needs that my fiancé is failing to provide on a constancy basis.

I feel really trapped because I'm about to marry him. I feel empowered because it's 2018 and life is too short to feel unwanted.

Nevertheless I was cheated on (twice) by someone I loved deeply before I met my fiancé and I know the pain it causes! I feel like a bitch but I also feel like I can't leave!

Is cheating really my only option. 😫