Over pregnancy!

UPDATE I GUESS.. Don’t get me wrong, I am so grateful to be given the gift of creating a life but I’m just so over being pregnant. And for such shallow reasons =[

It’s not the constant hip pain or the sleepless nights, it’s not the crazy heartburn or morning sickness that decides to come back every few days.

I can’t handle the way I look anymore. I just feel so disgusting. My partner becomes really verbally and emotionally abusive when we fight and I just can’t handle being told I’m fat anymore. Apparently my legs are like tree trunks and my stomach looks like “Freddy Krueger’s face” I just can’t wait till I look a bit more like myself again so when he says these things I can just ignore it. But right now it’s all true so it’s really bringing me down. Started at 125lbs and I’m already 160lbs at 34+5 😭

*** just updating so I can stay anonymous. We already have a son who will be 3 just after this baby is born. It’s hard but I feel stuck. Yesterday he messaged me saying it’s over and that he doesn’t love me. Literally sent message after message of where he plans on living and how I can keep the furniture and car but I’ll have to drive the kids to him etc. then he came home and kind of tried to act like it was all good. Then today I went on the iPad that is linked to his icloud. I decided to look through the notes, I’m a huge snoop after being cheated on by my ex.

There was a note from 2016 and it’s like a survey the chick is supposed to ask her boyfriend but he had filled it out himself and it asked how are we similar he said we’re not. How are you different .. in every single way. How do I know you love me? “I don’t” when will we get married “neva”

I’m sitting here a bit shocked. That was almost 2 years ago. This was a planned pregnancy. That was something he never even showed me and it wasn’t done to hurt me so it’s obviously his true feelings. Feeling a bit lost. Don’t know how I am supposed to do this alone. Sounds stupid but I have literally no money and I’m not working