Am I overreacting ?!

Hey girls, so I kinda need some advice.

I’ll give you a quick history to catch up. So me and my current bf have been together for 4 years long distance for about 3. We live together now and I feel like I’m doing all the house work. We both have jobs, but my work is practically inside the building we live in, he has to drive an hour to work. Anyway I do most of the cooking and I don’t mind that, I enjoy it and like to make food the way I like it haha.

Anyway bringing you to last night we got into a nasty fight, keep in mind we’ve only yelled at each other maybe once or twice before. The fight was essentially about I said “you don’t appreciate anything I do” because honesty it doesn’t feel that way. I’ll clean the room he’ll come home and it will be trashed within an hour.

So his response to that was “neither do you” and I cant really remember but what really ticked me off was when he said “you never say thank you for anything I do. I gave you the bowl, no thank you, I fixed the WiFi no thank you.. and so on” keep in mind we were both watching Netflix I asked if he’d restart the router. Was a thank you really necessary ( I was raised to be thankful and respectful and I do say thank you but restarting the router for us both to finish a show?!) and he also mention I never thank him for doing the laundry EXUSE ME, what?!?

So yea I cracked. I was like (and yelling “DO YOU EVER THANK ME FOR DOING THE DAMN LAUNDRY? WHEN I CLEAN THE ROOM? WHEN I FOLDED ALL YOUR CLOTHES IN THE DRESSER OR WHEN I CLEANED UP YOUR SIDE OF THE BED? WHAT ABOUT DINNER?! NO YOU DONT. WANNA KNOW WHY, BECAUSE YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TO THANK SOMEONE FOR DOING WHAT IS NECESSARY TO LIVE IN A DAMN HOUSE.”

Anyway, it ends with him telling me to shut up and not talk to him. I went to bed, nothing more said. Next morning we don’t talk. I go to work. The fight continues when he goes to work and now I just feel shitty.

Now just so y’all know most of the time when I ask him to do something while I’m at work it doesn’t get done. I’ll get in at 6pm and have to do it myself. If he’ll say he’ll do the dishes, most of the time he won’t and I end up having to do them in the am. Now it’s not all the time but enough that it bothers me. I feel like if we live together we should both work at living together. I shouldn’t have to ask for help around the house it should just be done just like I just do it.

So now. Tell me. Am I overreacting ? If I’m not what should I do to resolve this. And if I am how do I change my mind set?

Apparently we both feel we aren’t appreciated by one another.

Sorry for the lengthy post. Thank you to any helpers out there!! ❤️